Carol H Tucker Passionate about knowledge management and organizational development, expert in loan servicing, virtual world denizen and community facilitator, and a DISNEY fan
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beladona Memorial Be warned:in this very rich environment where you can immerse yourself so completely, your emotions will become engaged -- and not everyone is cognizant of that. Among the many excellent features of SL, there is no auto-return on hearts, so be wary of where your's wanders...
I spent the last week enjoying work thoroughly. The hours were long and it was uncomfortable in the session rooms -- will anyone ever create a folding chair that doesn't wear out your behind? -- and we talked reports and loan accounting. I went to San Diego and didn't get to see much of the city. And yet I enjoyed the week and came back feeling clear-headed and invigorated.
Why? because I felt like a professional again. I felt like I mattered.
Do I matter at work? Not really -- they like me and support me and I do the job that they ask me to do, and I have made a difference, but this is a job, not a career.
Choices -- it is all about choices, neh? I could answer the headhunters; I could follow up on the leads that networking brings and dive back into the career. Instead I stay at the CUSO doing work that I haven't done myself for a decade. Why? because quite frankly I don't perceive the value of putting in 10-12 hours every day and being available on weekends and holidays, ready to leap into action. When did the change happen? About four years ago -- March 2007. When I was at MSL, I wasn't involved in strategic planning and I wasn't included in management decisions for the first time since 1994, when Kevin and Donna recruited me as an agent of change. From 1994 to 2007, for 13 years I lived and breathed management theory, execution, organizational change and development, knowledge management. Why did I fall off the wagon? A CEO with a personal agenda yanking the ladder out from under my feet. Ignoring the depression and denying the grief over my husband's death. Dealing with my mother. Health problems. An economy gone sour. Yeah all that, but more importantly? It just wasn't fun anymore. I was saying the same thing too many times again and again, running into too many obstacles, and instead of motivating me to ratchet up my game, it caused me to stop and ask why I am doing it if I am not enjoying myself.
Ran into a personality test online and realized that I am always taking such tests -- so of course I took this one! Personality test results: Ta-dah, your personality type is ENFP!
Extraverted (E) 82% Introverted (I) 18%
Intuitive (N) 82% Sensing (S) 18%
Feeling (F) 70% Thinking (T) 30%
Perceiving (P) 91% Judging (J) 9%
On the whole, I think I am happy with this -- usually I quibble about personality tests, especially online ones. But on the whole, this sounds like the me that I know. I often wonder about the me that I don't know though, and I worry that maybe she is not a very nice person sometimes. Both my mother and her mother became very nasty women when their guards were down and I am riddled with fear that someday my kids will feel the lash of my tongue unfairly....
This struck home today and seemed to fit with my other thoughts....
CEOExpress
