Carol H Tucker Passionate about knowledge management and organizational development, expert in loan servicing, virtual world denizen and community facilitator, and a DISNEY fan
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beladona Memorial Be warned:in this very rich environment where you can immerse yourself so completely, your emotions will become engaged -- and not everyone is cognizant of that. Among the many excellent features of SL, there is no auto-return on hearts, so be wary of where your's wanders...
“We are never so disposed to quarrel with others as when we are dissatisfied with ourselves.” ~ William Hazlitt, “Characteristics”
And part of being dissatisfied is not being happy with outcomes, neh? When a stage in my life journey comes to a close, I find myself doing a lot of reflecting – and sometimes I am dissatisfied with the way that things turned out. As I think about it, I try to put it into some sort of context:
What is the outcome? How does this different from what you though would happen? What were your expectations, and were they reasonable?
What did you really want and why? Was this a need, want or desire – and how much of yourself were you willing to invest and did you do all that you could?
What did you need to do to make this happen? Was it really in the realm of your control or even the sphere of your influence? Did you go with my instincts or against them? Would you really have done anything differently?
Was this working? Or were you hanging on hoping it would just get better?
For example, Twitch has been running every single Bob Ross episode of the Joy of Painting. In a half hour that fuzzy haired man manages to go from a blank canvas to a gorgeous landscape, time after time after time, an outcome that many of us would love to emulate. He talks while painting, chattering about happy little trees and awesome clouds and almighty power to shape your world, but one thing he repeats again and again as he puts strange-looking blobs of paint on the canvas is “We don’t make mistakes, we have happy accidents.” The chat stream is a constant repetition of “OMG”, “RUINED” and then “SAVED”, and he even tells us when the painting isn’t going just as he planned and he is winging it. Not all of his outcomes are what he wants, and he doesn’t sign every painting, but you never get the feeling that he regrets anything….
Because if you don’t try, you will never know what the outcome would’ve, could’ve been. And if you do try and the outcome is not what you expected or wanted? That does not negate the effort or erase the journey or invalidate the choices that you made