Carol H Tucker Passionate about knowledge management and organizational development, expert in loan servicing, virtual world denizen and community facilitator, and a DISNEY fan
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beladona Memorial Be warned:in this very rich environment where you can immerse yourself so completely, your emotions will become engaged -- and not everyone is cognizant of that. Among the many excellent features of SL, there is no auto-return on hearts, so be wary of where your's wanders...
I have a theory about how folks act when they are angry, dividing them into thunderstorms and volcanoes. A thunderstorm clouds over and breaks with a gust and a boom and a torrential downpour – then it is over and the sun comes back out. A volcano smolders, building up heat and pressure for a long time, and then explodes – and keeps right on exploding and steaming and smoking for some time. A thunderstorm blows up quickly; a volcano takes a while to build up [don’t get me started on Yellowstone] Me? I am a thunderstorm for the most part – I rage and storm and sometimes throw things. It isn’t often that I get deep down smoldering quiet furious, and when I did, both my kids and my direct reports walked very warily around me until I went back to be vocal.
When a person who is a thunderstorm is in a relationship with a volcano, both people have to understand the difference or conflicts are going to end up being hurtful. Ever had one of those “discussions” that starts out with “now what is the problem” and goes downhill from there? Yeah, we all know the kind of downward spiral that starts, neh? A thunderstorm has to understand that a volcano isn’t ready to let bygones be bygones because they aren’t done yet and aren’t ready to move on. A volcano has to understand that a thunderstorm isn’t being trite when they are apologizing because they really are over it.
T’aint nothing wrong with getting mad. Like so many other things in relationships, folks just need to be a bit mindful of each other’s style.
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